


I found him outside, can I keep him?

by Mothfluff



Series: thursday nights and friday mornings [3]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series), Perc'ahlia - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Modern AU, Rated Teen and Up because of Alcohol, alcohol mention, alcoholic mention? I suppose, also lotsa swearing for some reason my Vex swears a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-04
Updated: 2017-11-04
Packaged: 2019-01-29 12:00:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12630612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mothfluff/pseuds/Mothfluff
Summary: Vex has had quite enough of this week full of extra studying and homework.Now she's gotta deal with everyone at the pub teasing her about her supposed new 'sweetheart'.And then suddenly she's gotta deal with 'sweetheart' and his very obvious problems.(All while Vax laughs)





	I found him outside, can I keep him?

**Author's Note:**

> It's the first thursday night! Off to such a great start! Or not.  
> You gotta add some dramatic undertones to a slow-burn dorklove fic, I think.

It had only been a week since her last engineering class, but Vex felt like it had stretched on for months. What was usually just a quick half hour of homework – granted, she'd never bothered to spend more time than necessary on this class, and oh what bitter irony it felt like now - had turned into a whole week of research, library visits and late evenings staring at equations that would not, could not be solved.

And that was just the first two assignments Percy had given her. She'd not dared to look into the folder he'd handed her with even more papers inside. Two assignments instead of one after a week, that should count for something, right? Surely it'd make him agree that she was taking her grades seriously now. Surely he'd decide to drop the rest of it and give her a damn C or D on the entire class and be done with it. (Surely he'd be a bit impressed by her efforts, she thought for a second, before beating down _that_ silly idea coming from out of nowhere.)

But none of that plan would work if she didn't manage to finish this set of equations tonight.

 

Before she could pick up her pencil to scribble some more useless numbers on the paper, Vax interrupted her with a theatrical slam of the front door.

„Get your shoes on, dearest sister! I've found us yet another great and well-paying job!“ That could mean no good – Vax's idea of a 'great job' usually meant either something so boring he could just sleep through it, or something so dangerous and barely-legal that Vex didn't even want to hear about it.

„Vax, I told you hundreds of times, _I can't_. I have to finish this goddamn homework so I can hand it in tomorrow.“

„That's for tomorrow?“ Vax's question seemed innocuous enough, but she could see the edges of his mouth twitch upwards suspiciously.

„Yes. My engineering class. Every friday. We've been over this.“

„Could it be, Vex, sister, dearest.“ He stood behind her chair now, hands heavy on her shoulders, and she could hear the glee in his voice. „Could it be that you've forgotten tomorrow is a holiday?“

She tensed up. Her mind raced. What was the date again?

„Oh, fucking hell.“ was all she could stammer.

Vax couldn't hold back anymore, and her continued swearing was drowned under a wave of laughter as he leaned down, still holding onto her shoulders, which she quickly shrugged off.

„You didn't think to tell me that the whole week you watched me work my ass off?!“

„I didn't know you were doing it for _this_ friday.“ He was still giggling and only barely lying. „I thought you just wanted to get as much done as possible!“

„I fucking hate you.“ She slammed her book shut. „Now tell me about this goddamn job I'm apparently working tonight, considering how much free time I've just gained.“

 

„Oh, it's a great gig! Scanlan's playing at-“

„I'm not working for Scanlan again. We agreed on that.“ The bastard had stiffed them last time, despite the copious amounts of cheap-drink-buying - which Vex realised now was mostly done to get them drunk enough not to notice when he paid them barely half of what he promised.

„It's not for Scanlan, and if you'd let me finish a sentence you would know that.“ Vax poked her side. „As I said – Scanlan's playing at Gilmore's tonight. I helped him set up, and Gilmore mentioned he was short-staffed. He needs a bartender and a waitress.“ Another poke. „I sang some praises about how quick on your feet you are and how friendly and customer-oriented and how good all my drinks taste, and he's agreed to let us help out.“

That was, surprisingly, an actually great job Vax had scored them. Gilmore's Glorious Gastro-Pub was a nice enough place – albeit somewhat chaotic and filled with the most random and weird customers she'd met so far – and Gilmore was as good a boss as they could ever get. If they worked the latest shift as well, he would probably let them take home any and all leftovers from the kitchen. He'd already done that whenever Vax stayed as a guest far longer than opening hours allowed. A well-paid job, food for the fridge _and_ a shitload of tips if she just practised her winks and smiles some more sounded wonderful to her after the stressful week.

„You have yourself a deal. When do we start?“

„Pretty much right now. Get your shoes on and we can help Gilmore set up the kitchen for the evening crowd as well.“

„Doesn't he have that new kitchen-guy that replaced Pike for help? Greg?“ Vex hadn't been to Gilmore's for quite a while, but Vax was a frequent customer – along with Keyleth – and kept her pretty up to date on their friends' shenanigans.

„Grog. Once you meet him, you'll realise why he won't be much help at all when it comes to delicate things like dishes.“

 

\----------------------------------------

 

8 hours later, Vex was still surprised how well her brother did in getting this short time job. She would have to actually be nice to him tomorrow, to say thanks.

But right now, she was allowed to shoot dagger-sharp looks in his direction every time he matched her stare.

 

It only took about 5 minutes after she put on the waitress apron at the beginning of this shift that Scanlan had made an off-hand joke about 'putting in extra work everywhere' that she planned to ignore. It took another 30 minutes until she was introduced to Grog, and his first words to her were „Ain't you got an important class tomorrow?“. It was so busy in the middle of the evening that she barely noticed Kima getting a beer at the bar and shouting „Didn't know you liked blondes, too, Darky!“ when she shuffled past her with a tray full of drinks. But the breaking point had been when Pike came in after an obviously exhausting day at the hospital, sitting down to an already perfectly prepared drink and patting the seat beside her, putting on her usual happy-mumfriend face and asking Vex to tell her „everything about your new sweetheart at college“. Vax had almost dropped his cocktail shaker from giggling before fleeing his sister's rage by dashing to the kitchen.

 

He didn't get far. He was halfway to the walk-in cooler before she slammed him into the wall.

„What the _everloving fuck_ have you been telling people about me?“

„Nothing but the truth.“ Vax was still giggling slightly, trying to push her away, but she didn't budge. „Just that you've got a class with a much bigger workload now and a new teacher.“  
„That is an awfully short way of describing the gossip you're spreading about me.“

„I'm not spreading gossip. It hurts that you think I would do that, to my own sister.“

She pushed a bit harder and heard him cough – her elbow was digging into his chest. „Pike thinks I've got a 'sweetheart'. _Kima knew his fucking haircolour._ “

„Now, to be fair.“ He finally managed to push her away just a bit, enough to let him breathe again. „You've given me such a good description of your horrible-not-horrible teach by now that I could pick him out of a crowd, and I've never even seen the guy. I know you're very perceptive but I get the feeling that you've spend more time than usual memorizing little Percival's... attributes.“

All he earned for his smug wink was a punch in the stomach. Vex had left before he could get up from the floor and stop coughing.

 

Hours later and with the pub now empty, she was still fuming about it. It hadn't taken a lot of insisting to convince Pike that there was no one new in her life – not that Pike would ever push further even if she didn't believe it – and she'd managed to mostly ignore or stare down any other jokes from their more rambunctious friends, but Vax had still avoided her pretty well. So all she could do was stare at him in anger. And now she couldn't even do that, because he had dissappeared somewhere while she was cleaning the bar top – which was, supposedly, his job as barkeeper.

Another figure appeared next to her to help instead. A tan hand, covered in gold rings and bracelets, grabbed a towel and began scrubbing with a slight jingle from all the jewelry. Vex looked up and looked into the dark, heavily painted, absolutely lovely face of Gilmore smiling at her.

„Let me help, Gorgeous.“

Vex couldn't help but laugh at his greeting. „I thought that was one of _your_ many titles.“

„Ah, but that is one of the rules.“ Gilmore pointed at the sign behind the bar. The usual jokey 'no shirt, no shoes, extra friendly service' had been expanded with sharpie during many drunk nights. „Everyone in this pub is gorgeous. Some more than others, I might admit, but I'd certainly count you in the top class as well.“

„Well, thanks. I appreciate it, even if it's mostly because I look just like my brother.“

Now it was Gilmore's turn to laugh quickly. „Oh dear, enough about me and my gorgeous friends. What about your new friend? Is he as gorgeous as Vax makes him out to be from your descriptions?“

She groaned and put her head on the freshly cleaned countertop. „Not you too, Gilmore. Why does everyone believe I'm interested in someone just because I dared to talk about him more than once? Am I not allowed to be annoyed by a substitute teacher without everyone immediately dreaming up wedding lists?“

„Hyperbole, dear.“ He softly lifted her head back up. „The lady doth protest too much, methinks. I'm pretty sure people wouldn't be bothering you with it quite so much if it didn't... bother you as much.“

 

He had a point. Not that Vex was going to admit it out loud in any way. She was getting far too riled up about some light-hearted ribbing – why couldn't she take it with a smile and a sharp joke in return, like she usually would?

„Besides...“ Gilmore pulled her out of her thoughts again. „I wouldn't be quite so adamant about how much you dislike this new fellow. Just in case it turns out to be a bit more than nothing.“ He lifted his hand, jingling again, to stop her from answering. „Because if it is indeed more than nothing, I'm sure he'd be a tad unhappy to hear how much you talked him down before we ever met him.“

„Gilmore, you're not ever going to meet him.“ The lady doth protest again, she realised. „But maybe you're right, overall, and I should cut my brother some slack. He's just making fun of me as he always does.“

„He tries, dear. He cares for you a bit too much, maybe.“ A soft pat on the back. „And now get your gorgeous butt out of here, and take your brother's gorgeous butt with you. You've been here far too long and helped with much more than you needed. I'll get you your official payment tomorrow, okay? And for the unofficial...“ Gilmore turned around, towards the kitchen. „Grog! Is that takeout bag ready yet for the twins?“

 

\---------------------------------

The icy air outside Gilmore's hit them both like an arrow in the chest. The absolute darkness beyond the streetlights at this time of night did not make the scene any more cosy. Despite still being angry with him, Vex couldn't resist huddling against her brother for warmth – and maybe a bit of feeling of safety, to be honest.

„At least we might not need a freezer for all this food, then.“ Vax looked down at the two large bags they'd been handed moments prior by a wide-smiling Grog.

„Let's just get home, and sleep.“

He steered her left down the street, past a smaller side alley that looked as inviting in the dark as it did by day – filled with trashcans, even more spilled waste, and leftover bottles from people who'd been thrown out of the various pubs around or were too drunk to ever be allowed in. And amongst all this dark rubble, she spotted a patch of white.

Instinct was all that made her pull her brother back sharply, against the wall and away from the alley. He was just as alert as her in an instant, probably thinking she'd seen a mugger or something equally dangerous.

„What?“ He barely whispered. „What is it?“

„Percival.“

„...What?“ Vax's expression changed from concerned to confused, but Vex only shushed him and inched forward a bit, peeking into the alleyway.

 

There he was, just as she'd seen it, all white hair and golden glasses and big blue coat. What she wasn't used to was the slumped position down on the ground, head hanging low. Nor was she used to the bottle in his hand.

„Holy shit.“ Vax had apparently peeked in as well. „Is that – that's your boy? De Rolo?“

„Ssh!“ She pulled him back.

„What do we do now?“ Vax didn't know why they were still whispering. It seemed like Percy was in no state to hear them anyway.

„What do you mean, what do we do? We go home!“

„Are you serious? You find someone you know crouched down in an alley and your first reaction is to run off?“

Vex stared at her feet, thinking of Percy's embarassed face once he sobered up enough to realise that she'd found him in this state. It would be easier to just pretend nothing like that had ever happened.

„I mean, I don't know. He's just...“ Another lean past the corner and a quick look at Percy. „He seems pretty out of it. Drunk. I mean.“

„No shit.“ Vax shook off her hands, still around his collar, and pushed his takeaway bag into her hands before she could react. „Let's check if he's just drunk or if it's something worse, though.“

„VAX!“

She couldn't stop him as he stepped into the alley and straight in front of Percy, who barely reacted by shortly shaking his head.

„Hey, bud. You ok? Somebody jump you, or something?“ He tried to sound calm, but Vex could hear the slight nervosity in her brother's voice. They knew all to well how much could hide in the rest of this alley.

„M'fine.“ She could barely make out from Percy's mumbling.

„Yeah, no, you're not. Where do you live? Is there anyone we can call to pick you up?“

No response. Vax sighed and turned back to her.

„Sis, come and help me at least. This is _your_ drunk bag of problems here, after all.“

She hated him for this, sure, but she was at his side just as quickly.

„And now?“

„And now we take Mister de Rolo out of the gutter and, preferably, into a warmer home. He'll thank you for it later, I'm sure.“

 

Vax lifted Percy off the ground and slung his arm over his shoulder. Vex took a step closer, pretending to try and help, instead getting a good look at the bottle Percy had left lying on the ground. She recognised the label, barely, from behind Gilmore's bar. It wasn't the cheapest.

„Your boy is pretty light.“ Vax could feel Percy's ribs as he put his arm around his waist, even through shirt and coat. „I think he's not eating right.“  
„He's not my boy.“ She grumbled quietly, hoping Percy wasn't awake enough to listen to them.

„Whatever. Let's get him home. Where does he live?“

„How should I know? I only see him at school.“

They stared at each other, blank, while Percy gave out a quiet groan from being dragged.

„Well, then. Should we just... should we take him home with us?“ Vax asked. Vex shrugged.

„Maybe by then he's sobered up enough to tell us where he lives.“

„Sis, I'm not gonna carry your pretty boy through town only to find out he lives at the other end. If we take him home, he's gonna stay until he's sober enough to walk back on his own.“ He looked down at the still groaning guy hanging off his shoulder. „And I highly doubt that's gonna happen anytime before tomorrow morning. He can have the couch.“

With that, Vax began dragging Percy down the street, only to be stopped by his slurring voice.

„Jus... jus leave me.“

„No can do, boy. The pub's closed, there's obviously no one else to take you home, and the police's gonna start doing their rounds soon.“ Vax patted Percy on the back and instantly hoped it wouldn't cause him to throw up. „Trust me, the worst place to wake up hungover is in the drunkard cell.“

„I know.“

Vex and Vax shared a look. _What a catch_ , Vax seemed to say silently, _you really know how to pick them_. She flipped him the bird.

 

\-------------------------------------------

It didn't take them long to get back to the twins' flat just a few roads down. It proved a bit more difficult to get Percy up the stairs, but they managed to get him through the door and on the sofa without any really major scratches or bruises. Percy had already blacked out halfway down the street, so at least he wouldn't remember where the few scrapes on his cheek came from.

Vax pulled off his jacket while Vex undid his shoes, and together they draped him over the old couch. Vex carefully lifted his glasses off his face and put them on the table, at the same time shooing away Trinket, who was very interested in this stranger suddenly taking up all the space on _his_ couch. She wasn't fast enough to stop him from licking right across Percy's face.

Luckily it only elicited another groan before he turned his head away and quietly snored again. He looked so calm, it was hard to believe she'd only just found him in a beer puddle next to a pub. It was hard to believe she'd met him there at all.

 

„Well, let's see here.“ She was still lost in thought when she heard her brother at the other end of the room and looked up. There he was, Percy's coat in front of him on the hanger, his hands already deep in its pockets.

„Vax, what _the fuck_?!“ She hissed. „Don't go through his stuff! _Don't steal anything_!“

„Oh please, sis. Like I'd be that stupid.“ His hands didn't stop, though. „I just wanna see if he has a cellphone or something. We gotta let somebody know where he is, don't we?“ One hand emerged – with a very crumbled pack of smokes. „An alcoholic smoker. What a lovely set of addictions.“ The other hand emerged empty. „No cellphone, though. Maybe in his jeans pocket?“

„ _We are not picking his pockets while he's asleep.“_

Vax was by now going through what she could only assume was Percy's wallet. He pulled out an ID and snorted almost immediately.

„Oh, poor boy.“

„What?“ Vex was up and halfway towards him, but he quickly pushed the ID back in.

„Nothing, dear sister. Nothing that you should know, if he's not willingly told you yet.“

„He hasn't told _you_ anything willingly either! You just went through his stuff!“

Vex made a move for the wallet, but Vax pushed it back into the coat quicker.

„Okay, so no phone to call someone, I've no idea where the adress from his ID is, nothing else in the pockets that could tell us anything, except that he is as unhealthy as he could get. Your boy is a mystery man in his own right.“

„If you don't stop calling him my boy, I'm going to punch you where it hurts.“

„Let's just let him sleep off everything on the couch and worry about it in the morning.“ Vax was obviously getting tired and ignoring his sister's threats.

„I'm gonna worry the whole night.“ She'd murmured to herself, but he heard.

„Vex, he's fine. Sure, drunk out of his ass and probably frozen halfway through, but he'll be alright.“

„That's not- ...not exactly what I meant.“ She sighed. Why did _she_ have to find him like this? What would he think once he remembered? How much more embarassing could their whole situation get, anyway?

_And why the hell was he getting blackout drunk?,_ a true worry crept into the back of her head.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Next up (at any point in time, sorry): We finally get to see how Percy thinks about all this! And how he deals with the hangover, I suppose.


End file.
